Balance

Life is indisputably the pursuit of happiness, but our individual interpretation of that state is always subjective. My personal take is grounded in a simple 'work equals reward' ethic. My belief is that if one doggedly works towards any ambition, the rewards should eventually come to fruition. If only life could be that simple, where it’s often a paradigm.  It’s only through honest personal reflection and hard lessons learnt I’ve come to see some difficult realities. Life is a great balancing act – the Ying and the Yang if you like. And despite ambition, drive and determination the metaphorical wheels can very much come off at any time;

I began running about 5 years ago now, and within twelve months I’d run a half, a marathon and my first ultra. A year later, I was running 50 and 60 milers as hard as I could. I didn’t understand running easy, it just didn’t seem right to train hard and not honour that with anything less than my best effort. Of course, I was regularly struck with niggling injuries. However, I managed through these and soldiered on regardless. Others around me seemed to be able to churn out higher mileage training weeks without the same problems though. I questioned whether my training intensity, mostly in the hills of the Peak District, was too high on a day-to-day basis. The most likely causation factor was my relative infancy in the sport and a lack of strength in my body. Suffice to say I always pushed, believing that the rewards and gains would keep coming.

2015 saw me run my first hundred miler in the summer at the Lakeland 100. I was pleased with a finish there in 26 hours, but suffering a big slow down near the end I saw definite room for improvement. After a second place in a 50 miler in September (on already tired legs) I upgraded my White Rose Ultra entry to a hundred miler in November. This went surprisingly well coming 1^st male  in under 19 hours despite a developing virus and heavy fatigue from the years racing. On retrospect, although the results were pretty good for me, the underlying issues were largely ignored.

Over the winter I suffered with a lingering virus for over 6 months, but ambitions were still high with 3 more hundred milers lined up for 2016. Clearly this would become my undoing as the year unfolded with unsatisfactory performances and my first DNF back at the Lakeland.  Initially I reeled from the disappointed, but slowly became more pragmatic about my plight. After a final futile, and very slow, push round the Hardmoors 60, it was time to wake up to the reality of my situation and get some quality rest.

I frantically researched my condition, looking into the signs and symptoms of the dreaded over-training syndrome. At first the enforced rest made things worse, I was restless and hyperactive but also exhausted at the same time. Even ascending a flight of stairs saw me tired and breathless.

My experience with this ‘illness’ over a three month period has brought me to a series of conclusions about how I got here. I’ve clearly run too many 100 milers in a 12 month period, especially being new to the distance. Such strength in the body is not only a matter of will, it’s built with time and patience. Although I’d started a foundation, I’ve just piled too much on top causing everything to collapse. I’ve also never taken any significant time out in the last 5 years. I now firmly believe it’s healthy to have a good 2 to 4 week break once a year if you’re racing and training hard. It’s widely known that most training adaptions occur when resting. So in hindsight, to underestimate the value of time out now seems absurd.

It’s only now I see that running had become my identity. Without it I felt useless, crest fallen, with nothing to occupy my day and tire my ambitious character. Only time would serve to alleviate my symptoms and mentality. The support from family, friends and encouragement from the kind folks at Salomon would prove to be invaluable to my sanity during my recovery. As time passed, I tried to expand my repertoire without further straining my already crushed nervous system. Only now can I see the true value of cross-training to open my mind to the benefits of other activities. I’d forgotten the excitement of partaking in a new sport and seeing the initial steep learning curve and the satisfaction it brings. Revisiting climbing was like meeting an old friend, but trying skiing an exciting new adventure I can share with my family. Cycling is proving to be a great low-impact alternative to running while maintaining a level of fitness during my ‘rest’. All these new activities helped my mood and gave me a fresh perspective.

One of the most valuable aspects of my recovery has come from diet. I’ve learnt that a heavily fatigued adrenal system can only truly recover with quality nutrition. This means a combination of unprocessed foods such as fruits and vegetables. This gives a rested body the right vitamins and minerals to rebuild in strength. I also took the time to step away from running much of my long runs in a fasted state. While I believe this has allowed me to become well fat adapted, it wouldn’t be wise to strain my systems any further. In my search for answers I also discovered the role of the autonomic nervous system regarding my medical plight. It seemed my sympathetic nervous system (responsible for the flight or fight response) had become over active. In contrast I needed to kick start the parasympathetic nervous system back into play which enables rest and recovery. To assist in recovering from an overactive sympathetic nervous system I needed to cut stimulants from my daily intake. That meant no more caffeine of any sort and a reduction in sugars, which although that sounds like drastic measures the results speak for themselves. Despite cutting back certain food types, I was cognisant of the fact that at the same time failing to fuel my body properly could easily be a backwards step. With this in mind, as well as fuelling on the run with mountainfuel.co.uk, I also used their recovery fuel to help me bounce back after training.

Over the last three months for every 3 steps forward in recovery, I’ve taken the odd slip back when I’ve over exerted myself, or when night shifts have just exhausted me further. However I’ve been monitoring my recovery using the sleep test on my Suunto that measures heart rate variability overnight. I’ve also run a regular 'fitness' test which involves running a flat 3 mile route at a specific heart rate – the results being that my pace increased at that same HR shows my health and fitness returning to normal.

The rejuvenation from trying new activities has proven ultimately healing physically and mentally. It's also meant more time available to connect and share new experiences with my family. While I’m well on the road to recovery now, it’s not without some hard lessons learnt. I’m excited moving forward armed with a new repertoire of knowledge and activities to enhance my fitness and performances going into 2017.

#TimeToPlay

Huge thanks to Salomon, Suunto and Mountainfuel for their ongoing support, especially through my testing times.